• Emerald@lemmy.world
    5·
    6 months ago

    Rust: you are transgender

    ASM: you are a nerd

    Python: You are a high school student

    Java: Your brain is so big you can accomplish anything.

    PHP: You could likely do it all in JavaScript

    HTML + CSS: You don’t know programming but still want to look cool. If you need JavaScript you can ask ChatGPT.

    Brainfuck: you like to brag

    • SagXD@lemm.eeOP
      2·
      6 months ago

      Python one is so fucking real as a high school student but I also know JavaScript and bash

  • Presi300@lemmy.worldEnglish
    3·
    5 months ago

    What your favorite programming language says about you:

    JavaScript: Error: “You” is undefined

  • EdibleFriend@lemmy.world
    3·
    6 months ago

    What does it say about a person like me who reads all these damn memes even though I don’t know jack shit about programming?

      • EdibleFriend@lemmy.world
        2·
        6 months ago

        When I saw this reply in my inbox I honestly had no idea which of my posts it was going to be related to because it could probably apply to most of them.

    • insomniac_lemon@kbin.social
      1·
      6 months ago

      I’m like that because:

      • I need a hobby
      • weird history with programming, but never actually liked any programming language enough to have a real project.
      • now I found a niche language* that I like but so far it’s just not where I want get started (one example, still no bindings for Godot 4)
      • Ray almost tricked me into making a framework for a framework but I saw right through that
      • personal issues

      *=Nim

    • theherk@lemmy.world
      1·
      6 months ago

      It’s worth going hungry in the dark. Lawyer up and hit the gym. JS doesn’t deserve you.

      • MajorHavoc@lemmy.world
        1·
        6 months ago

        And a Python developer is born!

        Source: I moved on from an abusive relationship with JavaScript to a healthy not-at-all-controlling equal partner relationship with Python. And four spaces makes perfect sense, once I really considered Python’s point of view…

      • fer0n@lemmy.world
        0·
        6 months ago

        I don’t know all of them, but I was talking about React being a framework, not a language.

        • SwampYankee@mander.xyz
          0·
          6 months ago

          Hah, I kinda glossed over that one. Not sure what the downvote is about, it’s a joke. JS and PHP are the two I’m most familiar with and they’re scripting languages, not “proper” programming languages. That doesn’t make them any less serious. Anyway, React, being a library for a scripting language, is two steps removed.

          • Doc Avid Mornington@midwest.socialEnglish
            1·
            6 months ago

            A scripting language is certainly a programming language. In fact, it can be hard to even draw a line at all. PHP is just-in-time compiled, and has static analysis tools that can catch errors that are normally considered “compile-time” - scripting language or no? Is Typescript compiled? Are JVM bytecode and WASM just very low level scripting languages? Can you write a powerful web application using BASH? What even is Lisp, in this context? “Scripting language” is a poor abstraction, really.

  • lseif@sopuli.xyz
    1·
    6 months ago

    in my completely accurate and objective opinion:

    • Javascript: you are a frontend web dev (hopefully)
    • C++: you spent too long learning keywords and classes, you might as well use them
    • Rust: you like big naked men butt booty wrestling
    • Asm: you dont know what a ‘type’ is
    • Go: you have chosen a perfect language.
    • React: you know its not a framework, so then it must be a language, right?
    • Python: either a child, or an ai expert
    • C: you are a better programmer than everyone else, because you know what a pointer is
    • PHP: rich
    • C#: learning game development just because you like video games
    • Swift: idk really. something to do with apple?
    • R: ???

    i use Rust btw

    • palordrolap@kbin.social
      1·
      6 months ago

      Perl: You’re an old nerd who remembers before Python was a thing, or else a nerd who really likes funky syntax and symbols everywhere and PHP just wasn’t right for you.

      Raku: You’re an old nerd who remembers before Python took over from your former beloved Perl and instead of opting for simpler, cleaner syntax, you decided that being able to go the other way entirely was absolutely for you, or else you’re a nerd who likes really, really funky syntax and Python, PHP and even Perl seem too much like kids toys.

      Ada: You’re an old nerd who was taught it at some college or other or else you’re an engineer writing mission critical systems and this is the language everything is written in and no-one will switch to anything else.

      BASIC: You’re an old nerd (you might be sensing a theme here) who taught themselves programming at some point in the '70s, '80s or '90s and you’ll get around to learning another language some day, but right now this interpreter you found online that runs in a console window suits you just fine.

      Shell scripting: You’re a nerd who really ought to rewrite some of those unwieldy beasts in something else at some point but you’ve learned it this way and don’t have time for anything else right now. Time for another hack.

      Powershell: You’re a nerd who’s found something that “really makes sense, you know?”

      COBOL: See Ada but exchange “mission critical” for “banking”.

      Prolog: You are a nerd who plays Towers of Hanoi in their head for fun.

      Haskell: You are a nerd whose flying saucer is a glass dome followed by a function that describes the rest of it, which may or may not be the same function that described the glass dome in the first place.

      Lisp: You are a nerd for whom parentheses make you feel warm and fuzzy, if not other feelings that cannot be spoken of in polite company. If you like Emacs, you like Emacs.